Friendship: Tough Love

I am a firm believer that good friends don’t tell you what you want to hear, they tell you what you need to hear. Ask yourself how many times you sought advice, only to get pissed off about what your friends said to you. Were you really looking for advice, or were you looking for affirmations?

Get a backbone!

I’m sure you have solid friends, but solid friends won’t let you perpetuate insidious thoughts that hinder your personal growth, and keep you from the things you want in life. Even if it means leading you away from them. An outside perspective allows you to see your truth, and face it head on. Good advice points out the things in you to improve, and offers suggestions on how to do it. It takes guts to make this serious introspection. And good friends will gut it out with you.

Listening is learning.

There are so many people who, when you talk to them, words go in one ear and right out the other. They aren’t even listening to what you’re saying, because they’ve already formulated their opinions or directions even before they asked for your advice. Listening is learning. Digesting ideas, and giving them credibility by allowing them to be worked out in your mind allows you to see new potential opportunities where you may not have seem them before. Ignoring them only means you’ll spin your tires in the same place as before.

Tough Love!

Don’t be the type of person who needs to be coddled like a child, in order for you to get the gist of what is being said to you. Yes, I understand that for many people it’s the way things are said that determines effectiveness sometimes you need to get to the heart of the matter regardless of how it is presented. Life is not meant to be flat-lined. Nor is it meant to only reflect jovial components of it, while pretending negative stuff never happens. Its ying and yang. Give and take. Learn how to take the tough love, and you’ll be able to appreciate the good love even more.

Life is full of ups and downs. Sometimes you need a good swift kick in the pants. Sometimes we need a good friend to shake us and yell “Wake up!” While you may find comfort in feeling sorry for yourself, empathy will quickly turn to pity, if you wallow in it. The biggest problems with people are the excuses they make. Finding good reason to move to action, instead of creating excuses not to may prove the difference to finding the happiness you truly want, or remaining in an unhappy place that you wish to change.
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